Inspiration

I am constantly amazed by other peoples stories and lives.  They just blow me away with their courage and bravery.

Hilary Weeks a amazing singer and songwriter has written this beautiful piece of music to capture the heartbreak of our stories and the miricle of rising above them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyX-I-um5Kk&feature=relmfu

I am a survivior of an amazing story that I have chosen to rise above.  I am a survivor

of moderate to severe depression.

It could have knocked me back,  I could have taken my life,  I could have left all that I hold dear.  But I didn't I chose to press forward and to hold onto faith.  This song was written for me and for many others. 

Enjoy!!!

Being thankful

Through all the blogs I read from America there seems to be one theme at the moment....Thanksgiving.  This is not a celebration we have in NZ but I wish it was. 

What a lovely reason to celebrate, being thankful for everything in our lives.  I'd like to think that we take this one day into our hearts and make it stay there all year. 

I know though it is very hard to do this as life just take over and sometimes even just gets in the way.  So today I am going to write my own thankful list.  Even after the year our family has I am still so very grateful for so many things

• That everyone is alive and our house is still standing
• That I am loved
• That my children value life (My daughter found the cat with a baby bird last night and carefully cared for it.  Many tear were shed this morning when it had died in the night)
• A home
• Democracy....I was able to vote last week in our elections
• I have a brain that works and functions (most of the time :)
• I can sew
• I can draw
• I have a family
• I have values
• I have Christ in my life
• I have not had to spend any time in jail and I have my freedom
• I can walk, run (sometimes he he) and jump
• I can pursue my dream of being an artist so many people can't
• That I have transport
• That I can read and write
• That I have been able to get an education
• That I am a woman

What are you thankful for???

Women

Last night I went to a Farming discussion group for women.  Dairy NZ run groups for farmers to help them in their businesses,  with networking and with support for their systems on their farms.  In this particular area they hold one of these groups specifically for women.  Last nights key note speaker was a specialist on time management. She was amazing and very inspiring.  I learnt a lot about using my time and using it efficiently but one the most important things I learnt was the importance of networking and supporting each other as women.



Each little thing we give and support each other in are big things.  We need each other to be whole.  I think every encounter we have with other women can be a blessing.  We can build up rather than tear down, we can love rather than hate and we can be unified rather than bicker about each other.  We can inspire each other to become better an do better things with our lives.

 

We are blessed now to be able to form relationships with other women across the world through technology.  I am inspired by a friend I met on the sketchbook challenge Dion.  She deals with some very challenging things in her life but still has to time to uplift others though her thoughtful comments and her art.  I have never met her in person but she lifts me up and inspires me.

I have friend that have come and gone in my life and ones that have been around a long time.  I have one friend I met on her first day of school.  We were five.  We have been through a lot of things together.  She knows the meaning of true friendship. 

Why is it with all the wonderful opportunities to help and support so many us spend so much time bickering and gossiping when that time could be spent helping and assisting.  We all have a responsibility to choose to be nice and to choose to support all those around us.

This can be darn difficult and some people are hard to get on with but I have this theory that We don't have to like every body but we can still love them.  I can spend time with everyone just some people I only have time with in 5 second doses and other 5 year doses. 

What ever others choose I can choose to be nice no matter what other women choose,  I lift up even if other pull down and I can love even when others hate.  What will you choose to do? 

Literature and movie review

If you asked my teenagers for their favourite movies or books they would probably say Harry Potter or Pirates of the Caribbean.  I'm not really into scary and blood and gore type movies.  I have seen them all but really it was to support the kids viewing (is that called spying ? he he)  My favourite book of all time and one I could watch over and over is Jane Eyre.  I think it is one of the best book ever written.  It has everything in it intrigue, mystery, drama, romance, clever dialogue, humour and relationships. 



The author of Jane Eyre, Charlotte Bronte was born in April 1816 to Rev. Patrick and Maria Bronte.  She was the 3rd of 6 children in England.  She wrote only a few works as she died very young.  Jane Eyre was a very popular novel from it's first publication.  It has been relased as a film or t.v series a few times the most recent in March this year.



Jane is an orphan who spend the first few years of her life being raised by her uncle and his wife, a cruel woman who cared about her own children more than poor Jane.  Her auntie sends her away to a charity school with the excuse that Jane was a bad influence on her own dear children,  which in reality is untrue as Jane was a beautiful well behaved child.  The school was of very poor standards and here Jane suffers many hardships and sadness.  When reforms come to the school Jane blossoms and becomes a teacher of good standing in the school.  When she decides to leave the school she seeks a post as a governess with a Mr Rochester.  The rest of the story builds on Jane's impeccable character and her relationship with Mr Rochester and his ward for whom she is responsible for. 

This story has many twists and unexpected turns.  Bronte has a talent for building very complex characters building up a story line beautifully.  Jane's character goes though much refining and is challenged beyond what most of us would not be able to bear. I think Bronte was well beyond her time for discussing topics that were not readily addressed at the time.  For example the hardships of poverty,  mental illness and disabilities. 

This a book that deserves to be read and re read to appreciate fully the depth of language and brilliant story line.

Patience

Patience is a virtue I sometimes lack. 




It is not that I don't try hard or put effort in.  I just think it is one of those things that will always be my struggle.  I have come a long way since I have had a family but I still have a lot to learn. I am a bit like this chicken......

As a child I was very impulsive and wanted things done right away.  I wouldn't get things finished unless it was a short job because I couldn't see the results straight away.  But I could ask question incessantly and never ever paused for a breath (hmmm...actually that really hasn't changed :) I still talk a lot) and I was patient if something really interested me, like a puzzle or a fun game, I always had to win (.....hmmm...actually that hasn't changed much either :) And I always could test others patience but the patience with people was very hard.

I had a strong sense of justice and could never figure out why people made choices they did.   I have learned that everyone makes choices for their own reasons and that that is their choice and that I need to accept and be patient with them. 

Patience is just waiting and keeping time.  it is learning to do it cheerfully and to be nice about it. I thought these quotes really get patience in a nutshell..

What I have learned about patience.....

• Being patient is a state of mind
• Being patient while 6 people are talking to you at once is very hard
• Being patient is difficult after you have found the toilet needs cleaning the 4th time that day
• Patience is a skill that gets well developed as a parent and family member.
• Patience needs to be worked at daily every experience at a time
• As my ability to be patient increases more challenging circumstances present themselves.
• Small things are harder to be patient with than really big things ie The toilet needing to be cleaned v major trauma. 
• It is an ongoing evolving skill
• I find being patient a challenge when I am sleep deprived.
• I am going to not be perfect at being patient in this life and it is O.K.

Tiredness

Tiredness seems to come along with life whether your single, married,  have children or whatever your life may be.  It seems to be the older I get the more tired I get with more responsibility and staying in bed seems like such a good option.



Life seems to just go tot fast and with too many things on it is a lot harder to recover. One of my biggest drains is other peoples use of my time.  Not the things I choose to do, but those things I have to do or am expected to do.  This isn't a grumble, because some things just need to be done,  its more of a factual statement about life.  Nothing ever seems to be finished and even if I get a chance to rest often there is so much to be done I can't rest.  Sound familiar!!

I find it fascinating that men just sit down and fall asleep......anywhere.  There is a joke in my family that my dad could even fall asleep on the concrete if he wanted too.  The funny thing is it seems socially acceptable for a man to fall asleep on the couch at the in laws but not for women.  (not that I would fall asleep I need to be in bed for that)  Women need time to be supported to have rest,  where as men just rest when they need it. But women see the the pile of washing on the couch that needs folding men just see the remote control and the couch.  I think if men sometimes sat and watched T.V and folded at the same time and if women sat down and ignored the pile a better balance would be maintained.  I loved the following cartoon which gets it in a nutshell.



I think there are many reasons for being tired and many the are easily avoided.  (but not so easy to rise above)   So why do we get tired and how do we solve the problem



1. Doing too much at the same time.  Try slowing down and doing one thing at a time when you can.  Focussing on one thing at a time requires less energy and is less draining.
2. Not getting enough sleep.  Get into regular sleep patterns.  Go to bed at a reasonable hour and get up at a reasonable hour.  Every hour before midnight is an equivalent of 3 hours....use it !!!!
3. Doing too much.  Write a priority list.  Do things that are important to you don't do things that have no real meaning in your life (sorry doesn't include house work....someone has to do it :)
4. Take time out for yourself.  Even when my kids were small and had grown out of naps I would put them in their rooms with a favourite toy or book for 1 hour so all of us could have some quiet time.  Use the time for you, not doing housework.
5. Not getting enough exercise.  Just get up and exercise.  Make it interesting (well as interesting as possible !!)  and make it a part of the daily routine.
6. Eating badly.  Find out the good wholesome foods you like and have them on hand for snacking.  Be aware of the empty calorie foods that get eaten and replace them with high energy healthy alternatives.
7. Doing too much for other people.  Service is important.....actually it can give more energy, but doing things that are other peoples responsibilities all the time can be very draining.  If you children are over 6 years old they can make their own lunches,  if they are over 2 the can pull up sheets on the bed.  teach your other half and children to look after themselves.  They will thank you for it in college or if you ever get sick the house should keep ticking over nicely.
8. Being mentally drained. Laugh, it is the best medicine and if possible laugh with friends.
9. Not breathing properly.  Breathing right really helps to over come tiredness.  Go to the library to help with this one I'm not a breathing expert. (actually according to my teenagers I am not an expert on anything)

If nothing seems to work it might be a good idea to see a doctor to make sure nothing else is going on.

So what are you going to do today to help over come tiredness?......I'm going to go for a walk.....Love to hear what your going do.

Literature and movie review

The book I have chosen this week is Cranford by Elizabeth Gaskell.  It was written between 1851 and 1853 and is set in Cranford, a fictional town based on Knutsford in Cheshire a village where she lived as a child.  

This book is best described as like a gentle walk in a park.  It is a series of vignettes about Mary Smith and her 2 friends Miss Matty and Miss Deborah,  both spinsters in this town.   The story explores the lives and relationships of a group of spinsters and widows in the Victorian era. 





Gaskell paints a wonderful portrait of the social class of this era.  She captures, through her wonderful portrayal of characters, the society at this time.  She cleverly describes moments in the lives of the women of this village while building  a humorous,  poignant and sometimes sad story line.

I really enjoyed this feel good book.  It was a lovely slice of life that was a pleasure to read. 

What have you done to value 'you' more?

On Thursday 4th August.  I challenged you to spend some time each day to value yourself more.  How did you all do?   I also told you I would let you know how I am getting on.  So here goes....

Each day this week I have tried to find at least 5 minutes to think(sometimes that was 5 min broken up into manageable 1 min slots-in other words I was interrupted a few times with........)



I have reflected on how much more I need to practice this skill as I haven't done it enough for a while.  I discovered that some of me is missing, hidden under layers of other stuff (starting to sound like Shrek ......"ogres are like onions they have layers...." )  So how do I find that stuff?  I have to keep taking time to think,  write, blog, journal and to prioritise time for me.  On way that has helped me in the past,  which I am planning to start again,  is to write a gratitude list each day.  (My post on Saturday will go into depth more on how to do this) When I write things I am grateful for about myself and simple things in life I feel more connected to myself and those around me.  This cartoon says it all......



Try and take a moment today to write 3 things you are grateful for about yourself and 5 things that you are grateful for in you life.  Think from your heart and be creative.  To start with when I wrote about myself it was things like I am grateful for my reading skills or I an grateful for my blues eyes now I find it easier to say I am grateful that I am beautiful (took a long time to get to that point!!!!)

If you need a way to be alone to do this .....maybe this technique will work.....





After you have done this reward yourself with another 5 minutes on your own to read or eat chocolate :)

 

literature and movie review

The autobiographical series Two pence to cross the Mersey written by Helen Forrester comprises of 4 books written during the depression and 2nd world war years.  The four books titled 

Two pence to cross the Mersey



 Liverpool miss,

By the waters of Liverpool

 

Lime street at two

are set in liverpool England in one of the darkest times in world economic history.  These stories are about the authors childhood and young adult years. 

Helen Forrester had a difficult and very sad childhood.  She was raised for 12 years in a wealthy middle class home in southern England. During the depression she went from a pampered existence to poverty in Liverpool, north west England.   In the first two volumes of her autobiography – 'Twopence to Cross the Mersey' and 'Liverpool Miss', Helen tells the story of her families change in circumstances, rich to poor.  It is a hard story to read, Helen has a constant struggle to feed her family and to keep her mother happy and to help her spiritless father. She lives without any luxuries and education which she longed to have. The last 2 volumes are more optimistic.  Helen has gained some Independence from her family and is living in slightly better conditions.  The books conclude with he meeting of her future husband and the happiness she gains from this. 

They are a wonderful set of book which leave you thankful for what you have and the time we live. The history of the depression is captured well in these books through her great skill as a story teller. She leaves a great sense of hope in overcoming terrible adversary and troubles .  A great read!

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."

-- Oscar Wilde

Who are we?  Do we really know who we are deep inside? 

My mother said "That there have been many days were she has sat down and wondered about the answer to this question. Who am I? Am I (here goes it is a long list....)  A mother, wife, friend, sister, community worker, daughter, volunteer, employee/employer (what ever that label might be for you), sister in law, daughter in law, mother in law,  grandmother, great grandmother, auntie, cousin, niece (I spelt this as nice first :) ) church worker,  quilter, etc?"  She said "It is hard sometimes to figure out who you are meant to be because we have so many roles in our lives"  (phew! are you tired reading that list.  I cetainly am)

These are all wonderful roles but do they describe who we really are?  I don't think they do.  The role we often miss or undervalue is that we are a woman, unique, individual special and brilliant. We give a lot of time to the many roles in our lives but do we prioritise time for the role we have as a unique woman.  There is no other person like us in our lives. No one else can have that role, no one else can help us grow and no one else can see the world just we do.  

What can you do today to value 'you' more?  Here's a couple of ideas to get you started

• Sit down for 5 minutes today and think about the qualities you have.  Write them down. (if your house is like mine you might have to lock your bedroom door and put a note on the door saying leave me alone for 5 minutes :)
• Lie on the floor and listen to a favourite piece of music and just be
• Sit and listen to your heart (see if you can find it! it might take some practice)

Good luck and let me know how you did.  I'll let you know how I did too.