Managing a home with a positive spirit

Do you have days where it feels everything is just collapsing around you?  Days where everything coming at you is negative, draining and filled with frustration. The moans, complaints,  constant listening,  and always having to be on board at your best.  If you do you are not alone. 

This picture seems like me sometimes at home trying to stay on top of things and not to get dragged down by others.

One thing I have learnt though is that........



Having a positive outlook even when things seem to beat down on you is imperative.  How can we as mum/women remain positive and have good emotional health amongst all this battering and to be able to follow your dreams.



Taking a sleep always feels like a good option :)  but unfortunately the problem is still there when you wake up.  sigh......

I have found some things that work well

• Take time out daily.  Even if it is only listening to a piece of music you love or reading a chapter of a book.  I have had to become very creative to get my reading time (as I am a book worm)  I have book on the toilet that I read 2 pages of when I use the loo.  It takes me a while to get through a book but at least I can get a little bit of time to read.
• Remember that you are the manager of the house.  Would you let your staff treat you like dirt?   I certainly wouldn't.  It doesn't matter whether it is a child or an adult in your home protect yourself.  Be direct though IE I don't like it when you talk to me like that can you please stop.  If you chose not to I will have your phone..... I will walk out the room......I will put you in time out ..... We are not punching bags but human being that need respect
• If I get a complaint for any child about a job they have been given I give them another one.  They learn fast!
• If I feel negative I read some inspiring quotes or I read a motivational book. 
• Phone someone.  A problem shared is a problem halved.
• Get out of the house on your own once a week.  I know this can be had a certain times of life but I know it can be achieved.  One thing that worked for me when I had very young children was to swap babysitting with another mum.  This meant we both got out once a week. I found I had to schedule time so I became a priority
• Take time to seek to understand before you try to be understood.   (This is one of Steven Covey's principles.) Just by understanding people your attitude can shift.
• Plan successes in your life.....don't plan to fail. Make small goals and stick to them
• Learn what drains you.  My biggest drain in being disorganised.  The more organised I am the more positive I am.  Work out what is your biggest drain in your life and make a change.
• Serve others.  I can be much more positive when I help others.
• Learn to say no to unimportant things.  Just focus on what gives true happiness and true fulfilment



What do you do to stay positive?



Coping with stress

No matter what I do at this time of the year I always seem to have stress.  In the Southern hemisphere Christmas falls at the same time as the summer holidays and end of year breakups.  I seem to spend so much time trying to balance my time and keep sane.  I feel really sorry for my children because of all the extra pressure and needing to be in so many places in short spaces of time. This is how I sometimes look on Christmas day and it really isn't worth it if we are to tired to enjoy the day.

I have come up with a few ways to cope in this busy season that work for me.  Not everything that I do will work for you but I hope there might be a couple of things that  may help

•  I try to keep fourth term extra curricular things down to a bare minimum.
• I write daily to do lists that I don't keep to strictly but use as a guideline each day so that as I get nearer Christmas I don't collapse under the strain
• I start shopping in June when I start seeing things on sale and I tuck them into the cupboard.  This helps the budget too.
• I take time everyday to smell the roses.  I may take a walk or look at the cloud or read a book.  Just something small to gain peace in my heart.
• I try to keep order in my home.  I sometimes have to rely on the children a bit more but it is worth it for the extra visual peace.
• I don't do everything.  I chose to say yea to some things and no to others.  I base my decisions on the goals and values my family is aiming towards
• I prioritise people first and jobs second
• I try to spend an little time each day with each of my children and my husband.  Relationships always come first
• I keep the lines of communication open in my home so I can see when things are getting too much for people.
• I keep a well used calendar which everyone in the house can add things too
• I expect help from everyone who is available.  If everyone does their bit the load is easier.
• K.I.S.S  Keep It Simple Sister.  I don't need to make ginger bread houses for everyone or elaborately decorate the house
• Remember to keep simple traditions with lots of meaning not traditions that take a lot of preparations and give very little in return
• Serve others it always keep life in perspective.
• Keep food simple but yummy.  A roast is always easy to prepare but is always delicious.

When I follow these things I find the stress decreases a little and really begin to enjoy the season.  I hope there could be something here that helps you.

Catherine xxx